Monday, August 31, 2009

Angel Baby

Yesterday marked the day that we would be expecting our second baby to be born...
Last year, after two months of actively trying to conceive we were successful in December.
Two weeks after a positive home pregnancy test, I miscarried. Those two weeks were so exciting and happy! Because we learned right before Christmas, we thought we would wait a little bit to tell Gwyneth and others the happy news.
On Christmas morning Gwyneth opened her very last present that was merely a small note inside a little box that read:

Some of my family received an email with only the first picture in this post attached. Some got the message right away, others had to think a little about it...

Looking back, we realize we shared our happy news too soon. You never expect this to happen to you...
It was very hard for me, for two weeks or so. I didn't want to do anything but sit on my couch and watch mindless TV and movies while knitting. This is what I knit during that time...

I cried a lot...I didn't eat, shower, cook, clean. Nothing for about two weeks. (Well, I did shower...)
I am thankful that David was patient with me and let me be sad...
I never told myself I couldn't cry...I just let it out. I had random outbursts but was able to hide them from Gwyneth.
It about killed me having to tell my girl that we were not going to have a baby after all... She was confused...still is a bit to this day and occasionally remarks that she just doesn't get it, "Why did the baby die?" I think the same thing sweetie...
We will always remember that time and we trust that God has a great purpose for us going through something so sad...
We are also SO very thankful and happy that we did not remain sad...but that God blessed us with another positive test the very next month!!! We are excited to welcome our newest blessing in only 5 weeks!


  1. Ok ... I'm at sitting at my computer crying !! I already knew this had happened but to see the video of G. so excited and then to read about what you went through during that time. It is so confusing. There is no answer. I'm sad with you. I'm also excited with you and cannot wait to meet sweet little boy Runyen ! Come on five weeks ... hurry !! Love, Bon

  2. Hugs, Khrista!
    I'm so sorry for you and your family's loss, but so happy for the new life that God gave you after that! I'm excited for you all! BIG hugs! I loved that sweet little video. Thank you for sharing. :)

  3. Khrista,
    I know that ordeal was very difficult, confusing, and just plain hard. I too was in tears while reading this, God did and does have a plan for your family and only he knows what it is. Soon your sweet little boy will be here but your "angel baby" will not be forgotten. Love you. :)

  4. Crying. I have never lost a child but my sister did about 3 years ago at 20 weeks and I just had such a feeling of "God this is so unfair." It is such an emotional roller coaster. I am so sorry you had to experience that. She has since had a beautiful little girl that I watch every Friday. I can't wait to see pictures of your precious little boy soon.


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